Monday, August 2, 2010

The calm after the storm

Its been two months since my breakup. Two months since my bout with depression. I am thankful for the friends that I have who have supported me through this most difficult of times. I now have a job, a welcome distraction. And new friends who are also very supportive and have given me so much laughter that its as if i have never been sad these past few months.

I am proud that I am able to get a job again. My ex-boyfriend, his now girlfriend and all his cousins have labeled me as insane and have nowhere to go. Its much more painful to hear all the hurtful words coming from the person you have loved for so long. But I guess he never really loved me, that's why it was so easy for him to label me as insane, a failure and that no one will ever have me again.

I had to kick myself in order to get out of my depression. I told myself that i cannot stay sad long. Yes, I am still hurting but I am no longer in a rut as they say. I can now move forward because I have picked myself up and pushed my feet to take a step forward.

I want to tell everyone who has been depressed that yes, there is a calm after the storm. Though the circumstances may not be as happy as you expect it to be, but for sure you will be able to move. Reach out to your friends, go out, laugh as if there is no tomorrow. In short, forget yourself, and the reason for your pain. Because for sure that person who has caused you pain no longer thinks of you. So why should you think of that person?

I am in the process of healing, of making myself whole again. And to that person, if he does read this blog, thank you for setting me free. Because I can now choose a better person who will love me more than I have loved him, who will build my dreams with me. Who will support me every step of the way and not chicken out when I am down and out. Who will not be afraid to hold my hand in public. To you and your cousins, and your precious girlfriend, yes the insane person is able to land a job without even trying hard enough. And this insane person is loved by everyone, unlike what you all said.

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